First we went to a pub with another group and was ok, but things didn't really kick off until we went for dinner.
We wanted to go to a Thai that we had recommended to us. Sadly they didn't have a table for 4 until 90 minutes later, so we moved onto a different Chinese restaurant called Sojo. They had a table instantly, and rushed us to order, so we were pleased that we would be eating soon.
We waited.
And waited.
Then my main order arrived, and my friends, and my portion of rice. We assumed that his rice, and our companion's food were on the way. So we waited.
And waited.
And waited.
When we gestured to the many waitresses, they waved their fingers at us and said "Coming soon! Coming soon!".
Meanwhile, my food had started to congeal, and my friend's main (still without rice) was stone cold.
They brought out the oriental duck salad, which for £8 was a tiny portion of cold looking boiled duck, with two leaves of raw lettuce and a bit of onion on the side. Which made perfect sense that they had taken so long to bring it out, as it was clearly a difficult and time consuming dish to prepare, as it looked like it had been sitting on the side of a table for a day or two.
After we waited more, and we were still waiting on a main, and three portions of rice, we went to chat to a waitress. She rushed past us, and when we stopped them and asked to speak to a manager, they claimed there wasn't one there.
We got up to leave.
Surprisingly, all of a sudden we actually got some attention from the waiting staff.
We had a waitress screaming at us: "No leave! Not finished!". We told her we were leaving because the service was appalling, and we'd waited too long (close to 2 hours), our food had gone cold. We didn't even start on the quality of the duck salad.
She decided to change tack: "We cooked the food, you have to pay!". We pointed out that the food still hadn't all arrived, the food was untouched, and we were leaving. She demanded that as we had asked for the food, we'd have to pay. We stood firm and refused.
She said she was calling the police. We told her to call them. The police would have laughed in her face anyway. She went off to use the phone, thinking she was going to intimidate us.
She came back and said we had to pay. We said we'd been through that and we refused, and were happy to just wait for the police.
She said the manager was coming. We said we were pleased, and would love to talk to him.
She then demanded we at least pay for the soft drinks we'd ordered to go with the dinner, and been sipping at while waiting. At this point we realised she was really clutching at straws. We refused on principle, even though it would have only been a few pounds each.
She said it was one of the top 10 restaurants in Oxford! Really?!
The only way I could start to rationalise this is:
- If we're only talking about Chinese, and excluding Thai, Japanese, and all other cuisines.
- If we're only including those in the very centre of town, so excluding Summertown area's Xi'an.
- Wok and Roll, the local takeaway at half the price
- Cafe Orient, a quick bite chinese which is also a third cheaper than Sojo
- Cafe Opium, a slightly more upmarket one which is also nicer and though more expensive than 1 and 2, still cheaper and larger portions than Sojo.
- The vastly superior Pink Giraffe.
- The random chinese takeaways and other eateries in and around the train station.
- Any chinese food from the Sainsbury's / Marks and Spencer range.
- Kebab van food with Soy sauce on it.
- Kebab van food without soy sauce on it.
- Even bloody McDonalds when they do mock chinese rib burgers.
- Then and only then, try Sojo.
And not even any sign of our fourth and final main course!
Hmm... Methinks we won't be going back there any time soon.
We managed to get food much quicker, cheaper, better and with superior service at the nearby Cafe Orient. It was kind of fun in a way, and was a good way to blow off steam. We regretted now just waiting 90 minutes at the original Thai, as we would have ended up eating before.
We went for a couple of quick drinkies afterwards. I had my first alcohol since my life fell apart. I had a bottle of the excellent "Quinns", a 100% fruit juice, where the alcohol derives from fermentation of the juice. It's a bit dangerous as you can barely taste the alcohol, so it's easy to drink. The nicest alcoholic drink in the world.
On my way back, I walked past a stranger struggling to hold up his vomitting friend. I offered my help, and it was gratefully accepted, so I supported him so he didn't fall forwards into the gathering pool. When we helped his friend up off the floor, I realised that it was someone I knew a bit, and so we walked/dragged/carried him to his home, where his friend managed to get him to bed. I couldn't quite make out everything he was mumbling, but I think I heard him lament he didn't know where he was going, how he fitted in, who he really was, and how the world works. Same with me friend, it's a scary place out there.
An eventful evening, and quite enjoyable in a weird sort of way. It ended up with me not surfacing properly till 4pm today though. I'm getting old.
So to summarise,
- If you were thinking of going to Sojo, think again (worst service in my entire life).
- To the person I met on the street, your friend who was looking after you and made sure you got home is a hell of a friend. I'm not sure how long he was holding you up for before I turned up, but I don't know how he managed. You're very lucky to have a friend like that. (PS Hope you weren't too hungover today).
- It's sad that philosophy and big life questions often only get asked by university students or drinkers (or people who fall into both). Maybe we'd live in a better world if we stopped to think occasionally.
AcidCat
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