I was driving back to Loughborough last night for hopefully my final time, and I realised that I'm starting to heal. Things aren't bad. I could even start thinking about her and thinking she wasn't the centre of my universe. I feel like I'm moving on and can start the next section of my life.
I think the end of PhD and being able to close one era of my life helps. I can leave the past behind me and look forwards, not back. I don't like to think about her in too much detail as I don't want to rip off the scar just as it's healing, but at least it's progress.
To underline it all, she haunted my dreams again last night and everything was all good. I don't want to go into details, but when the dream ended upon my awakening, I didn't feel despair. Certainly, I would have rather the dream was a reality, but the fact I can just enjoy the experience on waking is progress.
I feel better. It's about time things started to heal and fade. It's been nearly two years - about bloody time.
AcidCat
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