You really can't go back. I went back to my old lab for a visit, but people had moved on. Was lovely to see my old boss though. And met the new people who were nice. Sadly met up with Jizznut who is still a nasty piece of work - which reminded me the main reason I was happy to leave.
Religious nutters seem to like me. Jehovah's witnesses even find me in shops (while off duty and incognito so I can't spot them and avoid them).
I can't work out what to do with the girl who I obsess about. Should I go cold turkey and avoid her to try and get her out of my mind and break this addiction? Should I try and stay clear of her so I don't fall into the "good friends" category so I maybe have a chance with her later? Should I just abandon hope of anything at all like that and go for friends so I can bask in her presence? I dunno!
I'm lucky enough to have friends who are kind enough to tolerate my company, and insanely seem pleased to see me. I'm very sad that I no longer share study groups with the one I didn't have a lovely cup of tea with this evening(!).
I am a bit of an eejit. I tried to goad a friendly flatmate into working, by saying that if she did 2 hours of solid revision I'd go out and buy her ice creams from Sainsbury's. I managed to guilt her into trying to work... but didn't think it through as it meant I had a late night cycle ride in the freezing cold to buy them. Not very bright of me, but hopefully in tomorrow's exam it will pay off. And it got her to go and sit in her room (hopefully working) for a little bit.
Enough random bits for the time being. My brain is turning off anyway.
AcidCat
Showing posts with label lab mates. Show all posts
Showing posts with label lab mates. Show all posts
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Monday, November 24, 2008
Work-life imbalance
Hi everyone,
I've been really struggling with this whole work-life balancing act at the moment. I'm finding it very hard to focus in on work, exemplified by the fact that it's gone mimdnight on Sunday night / Monday morning and I'm currently blogging and not doing the work due in for tomorrow (which I've spent the weekend not doing). I've been itching to blog today though, so I can't avoid it. For once, I actually have things to say, so I need to come on here.
I've spent the day with a friend from my days of my PhD. She will always have a special place in my heart as she was one of the people I leaned on heavily when my relationship ended and I fell. She gave me so much of her time even though we didn't actually know each other that well - I just bothered her because it felt right and I knew she was a good person and lovely and patient. I took her for lunch as a little thank you, and we went for Dim Sum. I think she seemed to enjoy it. but she's so polite and kind that I don't think that she'd admit to not liking it. (I get the impression she didn't like the chicken's feet though... not a surprise).
We tried to spend most of the day inside as the poor thing was going down with a cold (in addition to the pair of black eyes she was sporting from receiving a hockey stick to the face last week in a particularly violent match). We went for milkshakes in the Trocadero, and then went to play arcade games after we saw a Time Crisis 4 machine (I really know how to show a girl a good time don't I). Afterwards, we went to Covent Garden for a little wander (she introduced me to a lovely T-shirt shop called David and Goliath with some pretty cool designs - I especially liked the "You rock, you rule" one). We decided to round off the day with a drink. As it started raining and I didn't know the area terribly well, we ended up in a pub out of convenience... turned out it was a gay pub with a rather loud transvestite cabaret singer putting on a show... It was quite fun, but not an ideal end of evening chat before we head off establishment.
Honestly, she visits her other friend the previous day - gets taken round an art gallery, and a theatre to see the mousetrap and a nice restaurant... next day she gets stuck with me, and ends up playing geeky computer games (I now know not to piss her off if she's got a gun, she's a pretty good shot and enthusiastic with it too!) going to a gay pub and being fed chicken's feet... I'm classy aren't I...
I had so much fun with her. There is no chemistry between us, but it did make me wonder... I think I could happily spend the rest of my life with her (if she could put up with me too). She's really cool and I think we could be very good for each other. Thing is though, I don't think we're interested in each other, and we make good friends. It emphasized the difference that love makes though... the way I feel about the amazing one is just a world apart (despite the similarity that I'm friends with both of them, and I don't think either are interested in me romatically (sigh)).
Anyway, I digress. This girl is also awesome (just in a different way). I don't know if I've given her a nickname before, so I'll choose one now - trying to decide out of khaki combat or garage girl. Garage girl seems to sound better, so she's lumbered with that one now. Anyway, garage girl makes me sad that there is no karma - she's such a good person and seems to be really unlucky. I really want life to go well for her - she's such a good person and a fantastic friend.
Garage girl - if you ever read this: thanks again for being there for me when I needed you. I have no idea why you put up with me. I genuinely think you're amazingly awesome and you should go and grab life by the horns... you've got something incredible to give.
Love to you all - better get down to this work.
AcidCat
I've been really struggling with this whole work-life balancing act at the moment. I'm finding it very hard to focus in on work, exemplified by the fact that it's gone mimdnight on Sunday night / Monday morning and I'm currently blogging and not doing the work due in for tomorrow (which I've spent the weekend not doing). I've been itching to blog today though, so I can't avoid it. For once, I actually have things to say, so I need to come on here.
I've spent the day with a friend from my days of my PhD. She will always have a special place in my heart as she was one of the people I leaned on heavily when my relationship ended and I fell. She gave me so much of her time even though we didn't actually know each other that well - I just bothered her because it felt right and I knew she was a good person and lovely and patient. I took her for lunch as a little thank you, and we went for Dim Sum. I think she seemed to enjoy it. but she's so polite and kind that I don't think that she'd admit to not liking it. (I get the impression she didn't like the chicken's feet though... not a surprise).
We tried to spend most of the day inside as the poor thing was going down with a cold (in addition to the pair of black eyes she was sporting from receiving a hockey stick to the face last week in a particularly violent match). We went for milkshakes in the Trocadero, and then went to play arcade games after we saw a Time Crisis 4 machine (I really know how to show a girl a good time don't I). Afterwards, we went to Covent Garden for a little wander (she introduced me to a lovely T-shirt shop called David and Goliath with some pretty cool designs - I especially liked the "You rock, you rule" one). We decided to round off the day with a drink. As it started raining and I didn't know the area terribly well, we ended up in a pub out of convenience... turned out it was a gay pub with a rather loud transvestite cabaret singer putting on a show... It was quite fun, but not an ideal end of evening chat before we head off establishment.
Honestly, she visits her other friend the previous day - gets taken round an art gallery, and a theatre to see the mousetrap and a nice restaurant... next day she gets stuck with me, and ends up playing geeky computer games (I now know not to piss her off if she's got a gun, she's a pretty good shot and enthusiastic with it too!) going to a gay pub and being fed chicken's feet... I'm classy aren't I...
I had so much fun with her. There is no chemistry between us, but it did make me wonder... I think I could happily spend the rest of my life with her (if she could put up with me too). She's really cool and I think we could be very good for each other. Thing is though, I don't think we're interested in each other, and we make good friends. It emphasized the difference that love makes though... the way I feel about the amazing one is just a world apart (despite the similarity that I'm friends with both of them, and I don't think either are interested in me romatically (sigh)).
Anyway, I digress. This girl is also awesome (just in a different way). I don't know if I've given her a nickname before, so I'll choose one now - trying to decide out of khaki combat or garage girl. Garage girl seems to sound better, so she's lumbered with that one now. Anyway, garage girl makes me sad that there is no karma - she's such a good person and seems to be really unlucky. I really want life to go well for her - she's such a good person and a fantastic friend.
Garage girl - if you ever read this: thanks again for being there for me when I needed you. I have no idea why you put up with me. I genuinely think you're amazingly awesome and you should go and grab life by the horns... you've got something incredible to give.
Love to you all - better get down to this work.
AcidCat
Saturday, November 01, 2008
Happy Halloween
Halloween yesterday. I hope all of you were having fun and frights.
For me, yesterday was a bit of a mixed bag. The first exam didn't go brilliantly, but could have gone worse. I don't know how well I did, but it was good to have seen what the exams here are like and what's expected of us.
Post-exam though, the day just stretched on and on. They scheduled a full day of lectures until 4:15 pm, which was quite a challenge to get through. My endurance gave out in the penultimate lecture... my flatmate later pointed out that he saw me fall asleep on my notes, wake up suddenly, furiously scribble a few words that the lecturer had just said, and then fall asleep again almost immediately. Apparently the lecturer had probably noticed, but not said much (perils of sitting in the front few rows). It could have been worse, the ethics lecture beforehand, the lecturer (who dabbles as a magician) who was giving us a demonstration of how people could be influenced, gave us a little demonstration which needed three volunteers... three people in the front row, one of whom was asleep much to her great embarrassment when she realised that the lecturer and entire lecture theatre had realised.
Anyway, the final lecture of the evening was about depression, a subject that I've got an obvious interest in. This week has really emphasised to me how much stigma is still carried on depression, how unsympathetic people who don't actually suffer are, and how untrusted anti-depressants still are.
It really pained me that people seemed to not really understand the difference between depression and sadness. I hated the fact that people seemed to be of the opinion that depression is something that you should "just pull yourself out of". The implication is that people are just feeling self-pity/enjoying being depressed. It worries me that this is the opinion of our future doctors: god help all of us depressives: I worry that the older generations of doctors are even less sympathetic... so it shouldn't surprise me about the very patchy treatment I've received for my depression on the NHS.
That was probably the most illuminating thing about the lecture. The lecturer was very good, but it was a bit of a "beginners guide to depression/grief/bereavement", so I didn't pick up much new. The main point of interest I learned was that the link between depression and cortisol is still unclear, whether depressives have too much cortisol or too little when they have a depressive episode. To me, this is a crucial area of research, which seems reasonably easy to carry out, so I'm very surprised that that trial hasn't been run yet.
In the evening, there was a Halloween disco at the university union which most of my course mates said that they were planning to go to. The plan was for them to go to a house party first, and then come to the disco afterwards. So between lectures finishing and the shops shutting, I tried to get a costume. Problem was, almost all the shops had shut by the time I finished the lectures. The shops which were open had sold out most of the costumes and mainly only had bad/expensive outfits remaining. In the end the best I managed was a pretty iffy kids costume that was a bit of a small fit... non-ideal.
I skipped out on the party to do gymnastics. It was one of the best weeks for gymnastics for me. I managed to land the front and back handsprings (on the sprung floor) and as there was quite a small turn out, the coach let me have a go on the "mushroom" and try to learn how to do circles. It was really difficult and I'm nowhere near managing it, but it was really good fun.
I went to the disco at about 10:30... none of my coursemates ended up coming there... they stayed at the house party all evening. It was a pretty boring evening. I tried to get into the dancing, but it's a bit odd to be the guy dancing on his own, or with people he only knows a bit (a couple of friends of flatmates who I vaguely know). It made me realise that I'm not one of the kids anymore, but also in a way how I'm glad not to be. Lots of them were genuinely having a good time (like my flatmate who as I was leaving was exchanging copious quantities of saliva with a delightful young gentleman), but plenty were clearly not enjoying themselves, but were pretending to, tipping huge quantities of alcohol down their throats just to make it more bearable, and faking having a good time. It seemed so shallow and somehow sad. I was glad to be able to leave all that behind me. I do wish that I felt closer to people though, that I was making an impact on someone, and that someone outside my family would genuinely miss me if I wasn't here. (A bit of an "It's a wonderful life" moment - I assume, I haven't actually seen the movie).
Anyway, I managed to be asleep till 3pm this afternoon, which I was shocked by. I blame the stress of the exam, so my body is catching up on its sleep deficit. It's a gloomy rainy day today anyway (can't believe how dark it is in the early evening), so it wasn't a day worth doing anything with. I'm off to write an application for an expedition (unlikely to get it, but it's one of those trips of a lifetime so I've got to try) and do some medicine. Hopefully, if I can get it all done today, I can have tomorrow off.
AcidCat
PS Congratulations to Captain Anal for becoming Dr. Captain Anal yesterday.
For me, yesterday was a bit of a mixed bag. The first exam didn't go brilliantly, but could have gone worse. I don't know how well I did, but it was good to have seen what the exams here are like and what's expected of us.
Post-exam though, the day just stretched on and on. They scheduled a full day of lectures until 4:15 pm, which was quite a challenge to get through. My endurance gave out in the penultimate lecture... my flatmate later pointed out that he saw me fall asleep on my notes, wake up suddenly, furiously scribble a few words that the lecturer had just said, and then fall asleep again almost immediately. Apparently the lecturer had probably noticed, but not said much (perils of sitting in the front few rows). It could have been worse, the ethics lecture beforehand, the lecturer (who dabbles as a magician) who was giving us a demonstration of how people could be influenced, gave us a little demonstration which needed three volunteers... three people in the front row, one of whom was asleep much to her great embarrassment when she realised that the lecturer and entire lecture theatre had realised.
Anyway, the final lecture of the evening was about depression, a subject that I've got an obvious interest in. This week has really emphasised to me how much stigma is still carried on depression, how unsympathetic people who don't actually suffer are, and how untrusted anti-depressants still are.
It really pained me that people seemed to not really understand the difference between depression and sadness. I hated the fact that people seemed to be of the opinion that depression is something that you should "just pull yourself out of". The implication is that people are just feeling self-pity/enjoying being depressed. It worries me that this is the opinion of our future doctors: god help all of us depressives: I worry that the older generations of doctors are even less sympathetic... so it shouldn't surprise me about the very patchy treatment I've received for my depression on the NHS.
That was probably the most illuminating thing about the lecture. The lecturer was very good, but it was a bit of a "beginners guide to depression/grief/bereavement", so I didn't pick up much new. The main point of interest I learned was that the link between depression and cortisol is still unclear, whether depressives have too much cortisol or too little when they have a depressive episode. To me, this is a crucial area of research, which seems reasonably easy to carry out, so I'm very surprised that that trial hasn't been run yet.
In the evening, there was a Halloween disco at the university union which most of my course mates said that they were planning to go to. The plan was for them to go to a house party first, and then come to the disco afterwards. So between lectures finishing and the shops shutting, I tried to get a costume. Problem was, almost all the shops had shut by the time I finished the lectures. The shops which were open had sold out most of the costumes and mainly only had bad/expensive outfits remaining. In the end the best I managed was a pretty iffy kids costume that was a bit of a small fit... non-ideal.
I skipped out on the party to do gymnastics. It was one of the best weeks for gymnastics for me. I managed to land the front and back handsprings (on the sprung floor) and as there was quite a small turn out, the coach let me have a go on the "mushroom" and try to learn how to do circles. It was really difficult and I'm nowhere near managing it, but it was really good fun.
I went to the disco at about 10:30... none of my coursemates ended up coming there... they stayed at the house party all evening. It was a pretty boring evening. I tried to get into the dancing, but it's a bit odd to be the guy dancing on his own, or with people he only knows a bit (a couple of friends of flatmates who I vaguely know). It made me realise that I'm not one of the kids anymore, but also in a way how I'm glad not to be. Lots of them were genuinely having a good time (like my flatmate who as I was leaving was exchanging copious quantities of saliva with a delightful young gentleman), but plenty were clearly not enjoying themselves, but were pretending to, tipping huge quantities of alcohol down their throats just to make it more bearable, and faking having a good time. It seemed so shallow and somehow sad. I was glad to be able to leave all that behind me. I do wish that I felt closer to people though, that I was making an impact on someone, and that someone outside my family would genuinely miss me if I wasn't here. (A bit of an "It's a wonderful life" moment - I assume, I haven't actually seen the movie).
Anyway, I managed to be asleep till 3pm this afternoon, which I was shocked by. I blame the stress of the exam, so my body is catching up on its sleep deficit. It's a gloomy rainy day today anyway (can't believe how dark it is in the early evening), so it wasn't a day worth doing anything with. I'm off to write an application for an expedition (unlikely to get it, but it's one of those trips of a lifetime so I've got to try) and do some medicine. Hopefully, if I can get it all done today, I can have tomorrow off.
AcidCat
PS Congratulations to Captain Anal for becoming Dr. Captain Anal yesterday.
Wednesday, July 09, 2008
Feel more like a stranger each time I go home
Hi everybody!
I went back to my academic lab as one of my lab-mates viva and finish their PhD. Was very tempted not to go as they didn't bother telling me they were due to viva, I was left to hear it from the people in the lab, all of whom were told.
I'm glad I went. Not massively for myself, although I did end up having a good time. I realised that most of the lab mates were absent via holidays. It turned out that there were only four people who came back for his viva, one of whom can't stand the person finishing the PhD (and the feeling is mutual).
I remembered finishing my PhD, and the viva that followed. What made it for me was celebrating with all the people who I worked with and it made me really happy. I'm glad I helped increase the crowd size for him.
It also gave me a chance to spend a little more time with some more people from my lab who I really like, including someone new who I'm very sad I didn't get a chance to work with her (She's really awesome: smart, cool, kind, funny, amazing diplomatic skills - invaluable in the lab...). Also any evening when I get a chance to chat to my ex-boss is a good evening. I don't want to repeat my gushing praise again as I'm in danger of idolising him.
Anyway, I'm did have a good time there. However, I did realise that things are moving on and I really don't belong there any more. The people who made that place such a happy one are each slowly leaving. It never quite felt like home to me (nowhere does absolutely - I still haven't found a place to call home), but sadly although it felt close, I'm realising as time goes by, it becomes less and less like home.
I'm hoping my next adventure brings me home.
AcidCat
I went back to my academic lab as one of my lab-mates viva and finish their PhD. Was very tempted not to go as they didn't bother telling me they were due to viva, I was left to hear it from the people in the lab, all of whom were told.
I'm glad I went. Not massively for myself, although I did end up having a good time. I realised that most of the lab mates were absent via holidays. It turned out that there were only four people who came back for his viva, one of whom can't stand the person finishing the PhD (and the feeling is mutual).
I remembered finishing my PhD, and the viva that followed. What made it for me was celebrating with all the people who I worked with and it made me really happy. I'm glad I helped increase the crowd size for him.
It also gave me a chance to spend a little more time with some more people from my lab who I really like, including someone new who I'm very sad I didn't get a chance to work with her (She's really awesome: smart, cool, kind, funny, amazing diplomatic skills - invaluable in the lab...). Also any evening when I get a chance to chat to my ex-boss is a good evening. I don't want to repeat my gushing praise again as I'm in danger of idolising him.
Anyway, I'm did have a good time there. However, I did realise that things are moving on and I really don't belong there any more. The people who made that place such a happy one are each slowly leaving. It never quite felt like home to me (nowhere does absolutely - I still haven't found a place to call home), but sadly although it felt close, I'm realising as time goes by, it becomes less and less like home.
I'm hoping my next adventure brings me home.
AcidCat
Wednesday, July 02, 2008
Something old, something new
Hi everybody!
Finally finished my placement at the pharmaceutical company last Friday. It's quite strange and a little sad. I got on well with my lab mates who were very welcoming (more so than the other workmates I met there), but I've got a fair amount of sadness about it (probably) being the end of my chemistry career.
Since being there, I realised that I've got far more skills with chemistry than I appreciated while doing my PhD. If I hadn't thought I was just mediocre with a test-tube, I may still be pursuing chemistry. Since A-levels, I had wanted to follow the academic pathway in chemistry: the plan was to do a degree in chemistry, then a PhD, then become a professor with my own research group. The experience of failure during my PhD made me think I'd crash and burn if I tried independant chemistry research. Now... I'm wondering if I'm throwing away something valuable.
Anyway, off onto the next new challenge!
AcidCat
Finally finished my placement at the pharmaceutical company last Friday. It's quite strange and a little sad. I got on well with my lab mates who were very welcoming (more so than the other workmates I met there), but I've got a fair amount of sadness about it (probably) being the end of my chemistry career.
Since being there, I realised that I've got far more skills with chemistry than I appreciated while doing my PhD. If I hadn't thought I was just mediocre with a test-tube, I may still be pursuing chemistry. Since A-levels, I had wanted to follow the academic pathway in chemistry: the plan was to do a degree in chemistry, then a PhD, then become a professor with my own research group. The experience of failure during my PhD made me think I'd crash and burn if I tried independant chemistry research. Now... I'm wondering if I'm throwing away something valuable.
Anyway, off onto the next new challenge!
AcidCat
Sunday, May 11, 2008
Viva forever
Hi everybody!
Just had a weekend to let the viva sink in fully.
The day of my viva was a fantastic day. My external examiner (whom I respect and admire) reassured me during my pre-viva stress by saying "I don't know about the other guy (internal examiner) but I've read through your thesis, and I say don't worry". It was a hell of a compliment. In addition the congratulations from him as we started the viva was a real confidence boost. Post-viva, the icing on the cake was a comment from him that he would like a copy of my thesis after I had finished my corrections so he could read through it as he was genuinely interested and wanted to chat to my boss about my work as an interested chemist and not as an examiner. Coming from such an amazingly smart and gifted scientist it made me feel so incredibly flattered. There weren't even that many corrections to do!
Other things about the day were also amazing. People who had left the group came back to say hi and celebrate with me. One of whom even took the day off from work to do so (he handed his thesis in on that day whilst there)!
My labmates threw me a fantastic post-viva party. They had bought me some amazing, incredible, generous gifts. The best of which was a framed photo frame filled with pictures of me with past and present lab mates. Made me remember the good times of the past 4 and a bit years. If that on its own wasn't enough, they also got me a huge array of other gifts, some silly and frivolous, and some very sensible and practical, but all incredibly generous and thoughtful. (Amongst which was my much appreciated group T-shirt with number 5 and "Enforcer" on it). It made me feel so stunned, and I hope I had shown my gratitude sufficiently, but am a bit worried that I was so shocked by their incredible generosity and effort that I didn't. In the unlikely event that any of you are reading this, allow me to say "Thank you. Very, very, very much".
The whole experience made me feel so mixed. It emphasised what a wonderful group of people I knew and made me feel high, but also made me feel sad that I was finally leaving, and would no longer be a part of my wonderful supervisor's amazing group.
Fortunately (in some ways) the next day, where I went in to finish my chemicals, an experience made me glad I was leaving. Jizznut, the only person in the lab who I dislike, showed his obnoxious, inconsiderate side. The group has a new PhD student who showed amazing diplomatic skills and defused the situation, but I'm glad I don't need to work in the same room as him. I think it's a real pity I didn't get a chance to work with the new PhD student however, as I think she's fantastic. My supervisor has a talent for choosing good students (with the single exception of Jizznut).
I said a goodbye to my adored supervisor. He's a person I idolise, just because he's an absolutely incredible person. He's so clever, but humble. An amazing scientist but with brilliant social skills (and artistic too). Reasonably junior, but incredibly generous. Just an amazing human being. I bought him a small gift to attempt to express my thanks to him, which he accepted it incredibly graciously and enthusiastically. He also gave me some words of wisdom, and was very humble about his input over the course of my PhD, despite the fact I don't think I could possibly have had a better supervisor. Such a great man. I hope I'm able to stay in touch with him. He said I was welcome to pop in, which was lovely.
I've been going on for ages, but I wanted to put this down, if for no other reason than a record for my own benefit. The viva experience put me on such a high, I want to capture this feeling so I can relive it.
AcidCat
Just had a weekend to let the viva sink in fully.
The day of my viva was a fantastic day. My external examiner (whom I respect and admire) reassured me during my pre-viva stress by saying "I don't know about the other guy (internal examiner) but I've read through your thesis, and I say don't worry". It was a hell of a compliment. In addition the congratulations from him as we started the viva was a real confidence boost. Post-viva, the icing on the cake was a comment from him that he would like a copy of my thesis after I had finished my corrections so he could read through it as he was genuinely interested and wanted to chat to my boss about my work as an interested chemist and not as an examiner. Coming from such an amazingly smart and gifted scientist it made me feel so incredibly flattered. There weren't even that many corrections to do!
Other things about the day were also amazing. People who had left the group came back to say hi and celebrate with me. One of whom even took the day off from work to do so (he handed his thesis in on that day whilst there)!
My labmates threw me a fantastic post-viva party. They had bought me some amazing, incredible, generous gifts. The best of which was a framed photo frame filled with pictures of me with past and present lab mates. Made me remember the good times of the past 4 and a bit years. If that on its own wasn't enough, they also got me a huge array of other gifts, some silly and frivolous, and some very sensible and practical, but all incredibly generous and thoughtful. (Amongst which was my much appreciated group T-shirt with number 5 and "Enforcer" on it). It made me feel so stunned, and I hope I had shown my gratitude sufficiently, but am a bit worried that I was so shocked by their incredible generosity and effort that I didn't. In the unlikely event that any of you are reading this, allow me to say "Thank you. Very, very, very much".
The whole experience made me feel so mixed. It emphasised what a wonderful group of people I knew and made me feel high, but also made me feel sad that I was finally leaving, and would no longer be a part of my wonderful supervisor's amazing group.
Fortunately (in some ways) the next day, where I went in to finish my chemicals, an experience made me glad I was leaving. Jizznut, the only person in the lab who I dislike, showed his obnoxious, inconsiderate side. The group has a new PhD student who showed amazing diplomatic skills and defused the situation, but I'm glad I don't need to work in the same room as him. I think it's a real pity I didn't get a chance to work with the new PhD student however, as I think she's fantastic. My supervisor has a talent for choosing good students (with the single exception of Jizznut).
I said a goodbye to my adored supervisor. He's a person I idolise, just because he's an absolutely incredible person. He's so clever, but humble. An amazing scientist but with brilliant social skills (and artistic too). Reasonably junior, but incredibly generous. Just an amazing human being. I bought him a small gift to attempt to express my thanks to him, which he accepted it incredibly graciously and enthusiastically. He also gave me some words of wisdom, and was very humble about his input over the course of my PhD, despite the fact I don't think I could possibly have had a better supervisor. Such a great man. I hope I'm able to stay in touch with him. He said I was welcome to pop in, which was lovely.
I've been going on for ages, but I wanted to put this down, if for no other reason than a record for my own benefit. The viva experience put me on such a high, I want to capture this feeling so I can relive it.
AcidCat
Thursday, May 08, 2008
Wish me luck
Hey everybody!
It's quarter to one in the morning, 13 hour until my viva. I'm scared. I was fine till yesterday, but now the nerves are getting to me.
Rationally, I know that everything is likely to be fine and I should pass but...
I'm also thrilled and grateful at the people who have wished me luck (especially my amazing ex-lab mate Pimp Daddy who rang me specially). I'm mildly disappointed at how few people have though and how many of my friends don't care/forgot.
Have been waiting for a long time for this moment. It's a rite of passage, and I think it's quite a big deal. I think I'm going to feel different after this. I want to make changes, and now is a good milestone/marker to catalyse the change.
Good luck to anyone else who needs it too.
Peace, love and luck to you all
AcidCat
It's quarter to one in the morning, 13 hour until my viva. I'm scared. I was fine till yesterday, but now the nerves are getting to me.
Rationally, I know that everything is likely to be fine and I should pass but...
I'm also thrilled and grateful at the people who have wished me luck (especially my amazing ex-lab mate Pimp Daddy who rang me specially). I'm mildly disappointed at how few people have though and how many of my friends don't care/forgot.
Have been waiting for a long time for this moment. It's a rite of passage, and I think it's quite a big deal. I think I'm going to feel different after this. I want to make changes, and now is a good milestone/marker to catalyse the change.
Good luck to anyone else who needs it too.
Peace, love and luck to you all
AcidCat
Saturday, March 17, 2007
Bitching session
Although it's still late at night and I'm tired, I'm feeling inspired and feel the need to blog, so here is a serious, long entry.
The blissful, together, close and friendly group I joined in January has truly disappeared now. I'm quite fed up about it. I've tried damn hard to keep everyone onside and together, and everyone's pettiness has destroyed an idyllic retreat. So here is my bitching session about my lab mates. This isn't a balanced viewpoint, many of them have virtues that I haven't listed, but I'm hoping this will prove cathartic and I will be able to move on and learn to peacefully cope with them when I deal with them day to day.
So:
---------------------Sound of brakes being put on-------------------------
I've had a think and changed my mind. I slept on it without posting the draft, and I decided to delete the bitchiness for various reasons.
If anyone found it, it would be unpleasant.
I don't think it would reflect how I feel about people in the long term.
It's not part of my pleasant positive future self.
If you don't have anything nice to say, unless it's useful, don't say it.
So I'm not going to post the nastiness... for now.
Till next time,
AcidCat
The blissful, together, close and friendly group I joined in January has truly disappeared now. I'm quite fed up about it. I've tried damn hard to keep everyone onside and together, and everyone's pettiness has destroyed an idyllic retreat. So here is my bitching session about my lab mates. This isn't a balanced viewpoint, many of them have virtues that I haven't listed, but I'm hoping this will prove cathartic and I will be able to move on and learn to peacefully cope with them when I deal with them day to day.
So:
---------------------Sound of brakes being put on-------------------------
I've had a think and changed my mind. I slept on it without posting the draft, and I decided to delete the bitchiness for various reasons.
If anyone found it, it would be unpleasant.
I don't think it would reflect how I feel about people in the long term.
It's not part of my pleasant positive future self.
If you don't have anything nice to say, unless it's useful, don't say it.
So I'm not going to post the nastiness... for now.
Till next time,
AcidCat
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